Last year, I got back into running. I've been running 7-10 miles a week pretty regularly and I feel so strong and powerful and grateful that I have a body that can still move. With this jump back into running, a friend spontaneously asked me if I wanted to run a 5k the next day. I've been running a decent amount, so without hesitation, I said, "sure!"

The last time I ran a race was 2010. Twelve years ago. When I ran a half-marathon. So needless to say, I was a bit nervous, but again - I felt confident in myself and knew that I could do it. 

Just one thing though, it is summer in Spokane. It was 95 degrees during the race and there is little shade along the Centennial Trail. I started and felt good (well, good as you can running in 95 degrees). By mile 1, I was hot, thirsty, and it felt like razor blades were in my throat.

"Just make it to the water station."

"I can't!" 

"Ok, I made it to the water station........"

I ran most of the way to the turn around point, but when it was time to turn around, I was overheated, covered in goosebumps, and feeling awful. I've passed out a couple times in my life and I knew that running wasn't a safe choice. So I walked the whole way back, slowing down in the shade to try to regulate my body temperature. 

The whole walk back was a conversation in my head that reminded me so much of why the lessons that we teach in Girls on the Run are important. I had entered a race and my body/the sun were holding me back - and that was ok. I could walk the whole way back and still be a runner. I could listen to my body and that was my victory. Being a Girl on the Run is about being joyful, healthy, and confident - three things I was accomplishing by showing up for this race and doing my best. 

Every time I started to beat myself up for walking in a 5k, I thought "what would I say to a girl I was coaching? What would I say to my own daughter?" I would never let them think that they had failed, so why would I think that about myself?  

This is all a part of my long journey of finding joy in running and I have to remind myself - you're probably not going to win your first race and you can't get better if you never try.